Valhallahan on 
Julian Hazeldine on 
Casey on 
Chris Striker on Ultimates 3 #1
by Seb Patrick ~ December 10th, 2007
 |
Let’s get one thing clear right from the off – despite what it says on the cover, this comic is not The Ultimates. To call it that would suggest that Jeph Loeb had even the slightest inclination towards following the continuity, characterisation or style of the first two volumes – when in fact what he’s done is write a regular Avengers story with some tacked-on shagging in an attempt to make it seem “edgy”.
If I were to rattle through a shopping list of the glaring inconsistencies between this issue and Millar’s run, we’d be here all day – but suffice to say they range from little details (Thor using words like “wouldst”) to baffling plot holes (Valkyrie turning up with super powers and described as the same age she was a year – if not more – ago in the series’ timeline). The strongest feeling is that Loeb simply isn’t aware that the Ultimate universe is distinct from 616 – how else to explain the switch to that universe’s costumes (aside from wanting to have Scarlet Witch’s tits hanging out), everything about Venom, or the fact that the Wasp has transformed from a dark-haired Asian to a white redhead?
Alright, so perhaps the book shouldn’t necessarily be judged on how well it follows on from Millar and Hitch. But if you’re writing a sequel series and you want to piss about with the continuity so much, you at least need to write a good comic into the bargain. Ultimates 3, however, can’t stand on its own merits, because it doesn’t have any. It’s a catastrophic failure of a book. The characterisation is paper-thin, the dialogue is lousy, and there’s nothing whatsoever that makes me care about the characters’ fates. The issue-opening scenes involving a Tony Stark / Black Widow sex tape were probably supposed to be funny, but are in fact pathetically immature. And the less said about the ham-fisted lack of subtlety over Wanda and Pietro’s “relationship” the better – although I will just stop to wonder how in blazes Janet Pym could ever be quite so happy about the idea.
A lot of hype surrounded Joe Madureira’s appointment as artist, but I have to say, his work here leaves me wondering what all the fuss was about. It’s very pretty at times – but it’s also hampered by a muddy colouring job, some poor storytelling (particularly in the action sequences), and the fact that his cartoony and expressionistic style simply isn’t suited to a title that once thrived on his predecessor’s sense of tangible detail.
It’s becoming increasingly difficult to fathom exactly what role Marvel see the Ultimate universe as playing – and, indeed, hype around the forthcoming Ultimatum crossover suggests they may be close to sticking a bullet in the whole thing. While Bendis’ consistently excellent Spider-Man deserves to survive in some form, all Loeb manages to prove with Ultimates 3 is that ditching the rest of the line really wouldn’t be such a bad thing.
Add the Comics Daily RSS Feed!
December 10th, 2007 at 11:26 am
Ahahaha. Too true.
Even though I do like Mad’s artwork (flawed he is, but I can forgive it all) the colouring has totally ruined it, and they’d better sort it out in future issues because this series isn’t going to survive on plot alone.
It’s train-wreck comics. You have to wonder if after reading the script for the first one the editors said “Actually, Jeph, why don’t we cut this series down to 5 issues…”
December 10th, 2007 at 11:39 am
One thing I didn’t mention in the review - Hawkeye? Guns? BUH?
December 10th, 2007 at 11:42 am
Didn’t you get the memo? He’s DARK now!
It amuses me that almost no review I’ve read has seen fit to even mention Hank’s suicide attempt. No wonder he’s depressed.
December 10th, 2007 at 11:47 am
Again, I nearly mentioned that, but it was more along the lines of “Uh, and Hank is no longer imprisoned at the Triskelion but apparently a member of the team again becaaaaaause…..?”
December 11th, 2007 at 5:34 pm
It was a horrible train-wreck. To be honest, I half expected it, with the way Ultimate Power has descended into incomprehensible goo.
Deciding to ignore almost everything that’s happened over the last two volumes and making the characters near-unrecognisable without any explanation whatsoever? No. Dropped. My copy shall be doing some good, though - by getting recycled.
And to think, I had managed to convince myself not to pick this up… until I actually got to the shop and bought it on impulse. And I forgot to pick up the USM issue I was actually after…
December 11th, 2007 at 10:39 pm
Good to see you here, Mike, hope you stick around ;-)
USM, incidentally, was another decent issue. I’d have reviewed it here, but for lack of space this week. But I’ve been pleasantly surprised how the change in artist has given it a bit more pep - Immonen hasn’t been amazing, but I do like that it’s given Bendis a chance to subtly let the characters age a bit. And what’s impressed me most has been, despite how short-lived the (potentially brilliant) Peter/Kitty relationship was, she’s been successfully integrated into the supporting cast even now. As I mentioned above, it really is the only thing keeping the Ultimate universe alive to me now (I haven’t gone NEAR Ultimate Power - my understanding was that it was an irrelevant crossover, and I’m deeply disenchanted with the amount of weight it seems to be having in terms of the UU as a whole) - and I also think it’s probably the only Spidey title worth bothering with, too.
January 11th, 2008 at 12:25 pm
[...] friends, the man who recently brought us a solid contender for the most widely mocked comic of 2007 has somehow found time to work his magic on the Jade Giant (or should that be Crimson Colossus?) [...]